OK. I've got to get over this blog crisis I'm having where I just can't writing anything. What happened to me today reminded me of why it can be complicated.
I'm close to being a nobody in Portugal. Or rather, officially I'm a nobody. In other words I don't have any papers (especially carimbada) that say what I'm good at, what I believe in, what I strive for, what I am passionate about, what I dedicate my life to. Therefore I'm not. It's that simple.
If I write my story in Portuguese I need to contextualise that tantos papeis, tantos provas de competência não é uma norma em muitos partes do mundo, incluindo os países que tem uma sistema de alto produtividade e eficaz.
Se eu escrevo o meu estória em inglês tenho que contextualisar que you must have a piece of paper and a stamped certificate, by a recognised authority, to prove that you are competent in something.
I completed a formulário today for some work that involves teaching online. But because I don't have the requisite papers, my formulário remains empty. Supposedly i don't know enough about pedagogy or learning or training or ... anything I'm good at. My life didn't fit in the formulário.
Eu sei, se és Português estás a dizer - mas a problema é tua. Deve ser chato mas não é tão difícil recolher, preencher e/ou entregar. Vives em Portugal, são os nossos leis que tem que ser cumprido. So fazes, ou paga as consequências. É obvio!
And if I'm writing in English I say that I don't have a mindset which pays attention to getting certificates that may (or may not) represent what I've done - I'm too busy learning and doing. And to many people - that will be obvious.
So depending on who I'm talking to on my head I will frame the problem in a different way. And who I am talking to in my head is often represented by people who speak different languages. But the different languages represent different world-views and different taken-for-granted assumptions - so I need to do different contextualising. And if you get different feedback from different communities that you are invested in about "who you are" then it can get wobbly somethimes.