Is there a football match going on?

Feeling irritable with all the big and small things I have to do this weekend I thought I'd take a break and go to the gym. Not until I got onto the streets, where there's not a sound or a person, did I remember that Portugal is playing England today in the quarter-final of the World Cup.

As I got closer to the gym there was a roar of ... something ... inside. I deduced that everyone is watching the football and decided not to go in. If Portugal is winning, I don't want to have to explain that I don't mind at all - as that sounds like sour grapes. If England is winning, I also don't want to have to explain that I don't feel anything - as no-one will believe me.

I did wonder about buying a t-shirt or underwear with the Portuguese flag or football emblem on it - to see if wearing it close to my body would influence my allegiance to the Portuguese team. Apart from the fact that they don't sell t-shirts or underwear in Jumbo with the British flag, I wouldn't do the experiment with something that had the Union Jack on it as I associate those kind of things with the National Front.

So, just for the record and in case you see me in the next few days. I hope that Portugal wins because that affects my local environment. But I hope that England wins so that I don't have to keep saying ... "I really don't mind who wins the football".